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'Berta!

from 'Berta! by The Handle

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about

As much as we love the province of our birth, seeing her engage in a 50 year toxic relationship with conservative politicians hurts our heart. Although this song is nominally about the poison politics of Jason Kenney, really any conservative demagogue could stand in for our main character. We wanted to couch the lyrics in the rough vernacular of the alt-right and show the true ugliness that underlies the slick rhetoric of the disaffected oligarchs who use fearmongering as a persuasion tactic to foment hatred among the working class. Our hope is that this satirical portrayal with shed some light on the truly cynical motives that lie beneath all the rah-rah jingoism and sabre rattling of the very rich men who want nothing more than to bleed this province dry.

lyrics

Alberta! I made you my bitch!
Took a shit on the poor and gave a tax break to the rich
Alberta, suck my dick
all them soft-cock soyboy libtards make me sick
I love the way you lick the boot of every fat, white man in a business suit
I'll fuck you over really cute
Tap the tree and drain the root in Alberta

Alberta, you're in the palm of my hand now
I'll put a motherfucking pipeline on every inch of Indian land
Alberta, good goddamn, I'm the man
and we're a white-trash, neo-fascist Taliban

You know I don't give a fuck
about anyone who's down on their luck
unless you drive a pickup truck
you're just one more pinko beta-cuck in Alberta

Alberta Uber Alles
Our nation standing tall
United in our Purity
With our backs against the wall
Our Little Kingdom on the Prairie
a sacred sanctuary for
all those who've been oppressed
by virtue

credits

from 'Berta!, released July 9, 2021
The Handle - Writing playing, recording, mixing, mastering

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The Handle Calgary, Alberta

The Handle is a legendary country rock supergroup comprised of members of local underground favorites Devonian Gardens and The Psychic Alliance. Known for their blistering live sets, twin guitar histrionics and golden-throated vocal harmonies, The Handle has established themselves as one of the brightest stars in Calgary's cowboy firmament. ... more

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